Nullipara
Is it me or is this a really ugly sounding word? Do you know what it means? "A woman who has never given birth." Nice, huh?
It's not my fault that I don't want kids. I am not fighting an instinct or anything. I have never in my entire life felt the *pang* of motherhood or whatever it is that people describe. In fact, the older I get, the more motherhood scares me. I have tried to locate these pangy feelings. I have closed my eyes and concentrated reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally hard. Nothing. Am I defective? Maybe they can come up with some kind of medication that addresses this "problem" of mine.
The idea of adopting a child from an orphanage is a lot more appealing to me, truth be told. I'd like to pick up where the Republicans leave off and actually give a kid a fighting chance in this world. I guess if I did this, I'd still be a nullipara, though, huh?
I should say for the record that none of my friends have EVER made me feel lousy for not having reproduced. Very few of my friends actually have children, so I am not the odd person out, by any means. And I do like kids - I think they are cute and quirky and silly and funny. I just don't really have a desire to have them myself.
I just wish my parents would have had another child to take this pressure off of me. My mother obviously wants a grandchild and I oscillate between wanting to please her and getting really pissed that this burden of "only child responsibility" is seemingly never-ending. I think I've been a good kid to her, made her proud. I hope that just because I don't plan on checking this one little box, she isn't going to hold it against me. Besides, she can always adopt one if she misses children that much!
It's not my fault that I don't want kids. I am not fighting an instinct or anything. I have never in my entire life felt the *pang* of motherhood or whatever it is that people describe. In fact, the older I get, the more motherhood scares me. I have tried to locate these pangy feelings. I have closed my eyes and concentrated reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally hard. Nothing. Am I defective? Maybe they can come up with some kind of medication that addresses this "problem" of mine.
The idea of adopting a child from an orphanage is a lot more appealing to me, truth be told. I'd like to pick up where the Republicans leave off and actually give a kid a fighting chance in this world. I guess if I did this, I'd still be a nullipara, though, huh?
I should say for the record that none of my friends have EVER made me feel lousy for not having reproduced. Very few of my friends actually have children, so I am not the odd person out, by any means. And I do like kids - I think they are cute and quirky and silly and funny. I just don't really have a desire to have them myself.
I just wish my parents would have had another child to take this pressure off of me. My mother obviously wants a grandchild and I oscillate between wanting to please her and getting really pissed that this burden of "only child responsibility" is seemingly never-ending. I think I've been a good kid to her, made her proud. I hope that just because I don't plan on checking this one little box, she isn't going to hold it against me. Besides, she can always adopt one if she misses children that much!
posted by Kim at
9:06 AM
6 Comments:
I respect you for knowing yourself and following your gut regardless of anyone.
It took me a long time to come to this conclusion. I WANT to want to have kids, if that makes any sense at all. I am actually jealous of women who do. I think I really am missing something that is biologically inherent.
I have read that this is common amongst only children.
Imagine living in a time when the only options for women were getting married and having kids or, like, becoming a nun. I bet there were tons of women raising kids and not too happy about it. So, I say, rejoice for your freedoms and choices. But, what I really want to say is that I love your label for the post. Totally cracked me up!
It's so true that the world is a different place today and society isn't as hard on women who do not have children. I could not imagine a time when I wouldn't even be able to get an education.
You could be a spinster and work as a librarian, a school teacher or nurse. You would be doomed to a life picking up soccer balls from your front lawn and keeping them inside to teach the neighborhood kids a lesson. Spinsters were usually portrayed as bitter, unhappy women and very unattractive (otherwise, they wouldn't be spinsters, right?).
"It's mine now."
Seriously, I have sometimes been envious of couples without children. Imagine all the romantic weekends away? No worries about babysitting, etc.
And this game sucks.
The game was a major pooper! And it just kept getting worse and worse.
Jere (Jr.) and Mary-Ann are going to tonight's game. I hope they get a winner!
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