Sunday, October 18, 2009

He uses the word "fart" too much, but I still love the book.

Don't get me wrong. I still crack up when I hear the word "fart." But it can be overdone. Maybe that's my only real criticism of David Cross' first book, "I Drink for a Reason." Am I wrong to think he's sexy? I have never had traditional taste when it comes to what draws me to the opposite sex. Which is why I still don't understand why I married my Banana Republic lovin' ex-husband. Oh, right, he's a wacko! Anyway, in most instances, I prefer skinny, nerdy, Jewish, funny dudes to the "People Magazine's Sexiest Man of the Year" types. Unfortunately, I must emit something all together too Catholic (maybe they can bottle my pheromones, call them "Schicksa" and sell them) because only one Jewish boy ever found me date-worthy. And he was half Sicilian.

So, about the book. I remember reading David Sedarias', "Naked" on the subway and laughing out loud. Well, "I Drink for a Reason" caused the same thing to play out. Except I was minding my booth at the Providence Open Market (bundled up in many layers of clothes, drinking coffee that had become crazy cold). There is one chapter that really put me over the edge called, "Things to Do When You're Bored." One of his suggestions involved an iPod and a shoe store. I read it, like, four times. In fact, I am fending off an urge to go downstairs and get the book to read that piece again. I also really enjoy the way some things stay in his craw indefinitely. Like his hatred for Jim Belushi. Some people might find that to be annoying. Just get over it, David Cross. Not me. Don't get over it! It's funny! He sounds like a total prick. And I hated that he got a television show several years ago. What segment of this country is sitting there waiting for Jim and the person they cast as his wife to entertain them? As I recall, the woman was waaaaaaaaay too attractive to give a guy like him a second glance, let alone marry him. I really hate that, by the way. How they pair the fat/old guy with some young, shapely lady. And he's always a really obnoxious a-hole and she's always all, "Oh, you!" or maybe she's really the smart one and at the end of the episode he has to thank her for setting him straight. It started with the Honeymooners and for some reason, it gets played out over and over and over. Either people like that shit or people think that people like that shit and they get tricked into watching it and maybe developing a sick liking of it. Whatever.

I also found all the Mormon bashing to be wildly hilarious. If you ever read "Under the Banner of Heaven," you, too, will enjoy a little Mormon bashing.

Random thought: Why do people say, "Well, me, PERSONALLY, I don't much care for (such-and-such)." Forget for a second that it is grammatically incorrect, but isn't it obvious that it's you? Do you need to add the "personally" part?

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