Important Series

Game 1: Andy Pettitte vs. Dice K

Game 2: Fatty Clemens vs. Eye of the Tiger Beckett

Game 3: Wang (Yawn) vs. Schill

It's no secret that I think Andy Pettitte is really cute. He's the only Yankee I've ever been sweet on. When he went to pitch in Houston, I thought it would have have smart to scoop him up, but now he is on a serious decline, just like the rest of them. (Did you see last night's Yankee game? Whoa.) Johnny Damon was not my type when he was a Red Sox, so he certainly isn't now. Jeter's head is way too narrow on the top for my taste. Same goes for Abreu. Bernie Williams was sort of too pretty. Cano is alright. Posada has the floppy ear thing plus a little horse face to him. Knoblauch = Rodent. Giambi = Reptile. Brosius = Doughy. Strawberry = Skinny. O'Neal = Rectangular. A-Rod = Don't Get Me Started. I thought that David Justice was really handsome, but then the whole woman beating thing surfaced. The result is: not handsome anymore. So, apart from Pettitte, I can't think of any cute Yankee players in recent times.

Game 1, as it turns out, will be the only one I will be able to watch. We've got a softball game tomorrow night and Thursday, I'll be at work. The Sox are up by 8 games, but we've still got 31 games left. Hopefully, we'll sprint to the finish. It all depends on how many nights off Francona intends to give our key players during key games. Word of advice for Tito: Once we've clinched the thing, THEN dole out the nights off. The only game I am concerned about is #3. I'm still not 100% with Schilling. I can see him losing it and getting pulled early. Or maybe he'll be all pumped and in the zone. In any event, I'm most comfortable with the Game 2 match up. Clemens is going to get rocked. You heard it here first, people.